Here's the short version:
- Track every grocery purchase—use any tool that won't burn you out (app, spreadsheet, even a notes app).
- Review weekly for patterns, not perfection.
- Adjust based on what you actually buy and value—not just a fantasy budget.
- Focus on emotional triggers, not just dollars.
Now here's why that matters.
The Wanter
I am a notorious grocery overspender. To my wife's dismay I will often come home with a second bottle of ketchup even though we already have a perfectly good one in the fridge. I just can't seem to remember what we have, and my wanter never bothers to care.
I came from a relatively wealthy family where I didn't need to worry about food on the table. I'm grateful for that. Unfortunately, it means that I just don't pay attention enough to what I'm buying at the store, and it's led to chronic overspending on groceries when I didn't need to. I get to the store and think "well, I can just have whatever I want, right?". Which might be true to a certain extent, but isn't helpful when I'm trying to stick to a certain spending range.
There's always a part of me that wants to live without limits, to reach for the boundless abundance that this world has to offer and wring it out like a wet towel. I can feel that part of me kick in when I'm at the store, and the fear that I'll never have enough to have all of the things I want. The wanter in me is boundless and understanding why this impulse exists has helped me work with him rather than fight him. He wants to eat the world. It's up to me to tame him.
Why Do I Overspend?
This may seem hyperbolic for a simple trip to the grocery store, and it is. But the human drama that plays out within me is easier to see when it is dialed up to eleven. We're all riding subconscious currents in our most mundane moments. The undertow can drag us moment by moment to a place we never wanted to go.
The tracking is just a means to an end. When I can see my expenses laid out, I can start to examine what's going on inside me that is misaligned with what I say that I want. Why did I spend $100 when I went to the store just trying to get a loaf of bread?
The answer is inevitably that my wanter wanted, so he got. I combat my wanter every time I go to the store. Sometimes his desires align with mine, and that's great! But sometimes he wants to buy that third jar of olives because it's convenient, and then I have to say "hold the phone there buddy."
What Is Your Struggle?
Having a running tally of my spending is invaluable in guarding against the undertow of overspending. But maybe your undertow is different. Maybe there's a voice in your head that says "We can't afford that" while the logical part of your brain knows full well that you can. Maybe you need a more expansive persona to take hold in the grocery store so that you can enjoy that $30 steak without self flagellation.
Our grocery store struggles are personal. For me, a lot of my subconscious instincts come out at the grocery store, and that's why tracking is so essential. I need to see what I'm doing and see if I'm living beyond my means simply for the sake of tracking. It's how I stay true to the life I say I want when the undertow of desire pulls the other way.